National “Car Free Day” in Los Angeles is a F**king joke

Today is “National Car Free” day, but I guess whoever was coming up with suggestions for the “National Days” calendars didn’t realize how fucking impractical that would be in this God-foresaken city we know as Los Angeles. Seriously, living without a car in Los Angeles is borderline impossible. I couldn’t believe how unsuitable this city is to walk around in when I moved here from the East Coast. I firmly believe in the walkability of cities (weird hill to die on, I’ll admit, but have you been to Europe?).

As much as I hate to say it, Los Angeles was built exclusively for cars and that’s part of the reason why it makes it such a joke to even conceive this city being a decently-walkable place. When you’re a city full of suburbs, all you can do is drive around from place to place. Being car free in Los Angeles, might as well be like being an 1850s pioneer… shit’s far and you gotta suck it up.

I dare you… try not to get in your car once today. Hungry for lunch? Walk under the 405 overpass to your local strip mall and try not to step through a homeless encampment.Oh yeah, gotta meeting in Burbank? Cool, lemme just hop on my bike and pedal like a bitch across the 134. Luckily Birds were invented so we can zip zap through Santa Monica looking like total pussies. (Okay, Bird scooters are actually really fun, but the argument still stands).

National Car Free Day, get the fuck outta here. In Los Angeles, that’s as big a joke as that next audition you have.