October 6, 2022

The Tap Daily

The Tap Daily is a West Coast based pop culture and entertainment website that features humorous and quick reading articles to keep you up to speed on daily news.

Man Sues His Parents For Throwing Out His Porn Collection

Just last month a judge in Michigan ordered a couple to pay $30,441 to their son for throwing out his porn collection.  The son estimated his porn collection was worth up to $29,000.  Before you go applauding this man for defying his parents and taking a stance in the name of smut, you must realize that this was not a teenager starting a revolution of horny teens to come, but a 43-year old man living in his parents basement. 

David Werking, son of Beth and Paul Werking, had been living in his parent’s basement in Michigan for 10 months following his divorce.  Nothing could possibly be more demoralizing than getting divorced, and then moving into your parent’s basement with a massive collection of porn.  Not to mention, with any kind of porn existing on the Internet, and for free, David must have been hoarding porn since he started masturbating. For that reason, who’s to say his porn is worth anything at all?  Sure some geriatric perv may want a mint condition OG Marilyn Monroe Playboy, but who the hell wants this man’s porn collection, which has been defecated on for decades?  Not to mention, in his parents basement. 

A live look at David in his parents basement every night.

David did not only have a massive porn collection, but as the judge described, “A trove of pornography and an array of sex toys.”  The adjectives used to describe his collection are sickening.  A trove of porn?  An array of sex toys??  How many different types of butt-plugs and cock-ring doodads was David working (no pun intended) with in his parent’s basement? 

One of the many Toys found in his collection. (Evidence provided by Michigan Circuit Court)

What we’re all wondering is what David will put this thirty-grand toward?  More porn and naughty toys David?  Or will you realize the $30,000 accrued value of porn in your possession was a massive waste of money?  David are you brain-dead?  Have you ever heard of XVIDEOS? 

Porn collection
Jesus, David.

When David had realized his porn collection was thrown away he received the message from his father, “Frankly, David, I did you a big favor getting rid of all this stuff.”  And what his father meant to say was, ‘David, your wife left you and you spend all day jerking off in our house, go try to get laid.’ 

But David took a hard stance, and decided that not only would he sue his parents, but he would also be publicly acknowledged as the man who sued his own parents for throwing out his porn collection, while living in their house…and after his wife left him.  Its possible that he recognized he had nothing to lose, and if he was going on to live a miserable existence alone for the rest of his life, he better have an absurd amount of porn.     

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