Are Mustaches Back?

Its 2022 and just about every single weird fashion trends is back that used to be cool in the early 90s and 2000s, especially having a mustache. So heres the deal. I’ve had a mustache for a solid 3 months now. Has this been a good move for me? Maybe. But lets be honest, many people have had mustaches over the past few months. Are they back? Here are the pros and cons:

What are the pros? For starters, they’re a great conversation piece and usually people make comments about the state within about 20-30 seconds. This is good for breaking the ice and showing your funny side. Tread lightly though as some jokes can be highly offensive, but hilarious (see below). Also, I have a very full mustache so its always solid and can be curled. This is a total pro and established a dominant position against most other men. Dare I say a mustache gives off BDE? This is a fact for sure. Also I’m pretty sure now I last longer in bed but that is just a hunch.

What are the cons? Parents immediately hate you. You give off that creepy sex face that women either love or hate. There is no in between. Also, anyone with a mustache has to understand that anyone with young children is on edge while your around. You could be a kidnapper, there just isn’t a way to tell for sure. So its important to not be offended when parents grab their children or immediately make a defensive stance while you’re around. The best thing to do in this situation is grab some duct tape and start sprinting at them aggressively. This shows that your eager to help them around their house and will score you some points.